You’ve likely done all the things to prepare for a new baby – paint the nursery, finish the registry, plan the baby shower, pack your hospital bags. But how much thought and planning has gone into how to create a positive postpartum season?
In North America, our culture is all about “bouncing back” and life returning to “normal” post baby. But in many cultures around the world there is a heavy focus on rest and healing during the postpartum season!
These are some of the things I focused on to prepare for a restful postpartum season full of healing and bonding!
CREATE A PLAN TO PRIORITIZE HEALING + BONDING
While you’re still pregnant, create a plan with your family (kids, spouse, or others who will be around often). Agree on who will be responsible for certain tasks, whether those are related to the baby, the home, etc.
Make sure everyone is on the same page when it comes to the breakdown of responsibilities.
The ultimate goal is that the new mom can snuggle, cherish and bond with her new baby while others take care of her.
Bonding time may sounds like a luxury, but it’s actually a physiological necessity. Spending time skin-on-skin is beneficial for both baby and mom. It helps stimulate milk production, soothes baby, regulates body temperature, and promotes a strong bond between mom & baby!
Obviously in our modern age not every woman has the privilege of laying in bed for 30 days while the women in her village bring her warm soups all day (Don’t you wish?!).
But every woman can create some sort of plan to ensure that she can spend time bonding with baby in those first few days and weeks.
Practically how does that look?
- Prepare food ahead of time to save time!
- Communicate your needs with your partner, spouse, family or community
- Set boundaries around visitation
- Prepare your home for ease
COMMUNICATION
Your spouse, family or “village” cannot read your mind. And unless you come from a culture that cherishes this postpartum season, there’s a chance they don’t really know what you need!
There’s a good chance you have people in your life who want to help! But they may not know HOW they can help. Brainstorm what you think you’ll need help with (laundry, cleaning, errands, childcare, holding the baby so you can shower/sleep, etc) and share this with a loved one who is willing to help.
Communicate with your work or community that you will be unavailable for a certain amount of time. This is a season of your life when it’s ok to press pause on obligations and allow others to care for you!
FOOD PREPARATION
I cannot recommend food preparation enough. Truly, there is no such thing as too much prep! The last thing you want to worry about in those sleep deprived newborn days is cooking!
Not to mention that proper nutrition (Hint: forgetting to feed yourself until 2pm isn’t proper nutrition!) is the foundation to your health. If you want to heal quickly, have lots of energy, have clear skin and strong hair, and plenty of breastmilk – you NEED to be nourishing yourself.
Ways to prepare food for postpartum:
- Stock your pantry with snacks that are easy to grab and eat one handed while holding baby! Such as granola bars, apple sauce, trail mix, dried fruits, crackers.
- Stock up on an extra month of your pantry essentials such as flour, pasta + pasta sauce, salsa, peanut butter, rice, chicken stock, oats, maple syrup, cooking oils, or other ingredients you like to keep on hand for quick meals! Not having to go to the store in the first month is so helpful.
- Prep and freeze snacks for the middle of the night or in between meals (especially if you’re planning to breastfeed!). I loved having muffins, oatmeal cookies, banana bread, protein balls.
- Prep breakfast options. Many moms struggle the most with breakfast. Having some things prepared and frozen ahead of time is helpful for postpartum! I loved egg sandwiches, mini quiches, smoothie packets, granola for yogurt.
- Prep and freeze dinners! It’s hard to spend an hour prepping a healthy dinner in the early days when baby wants to be held 24/7. A quick “dinner meal prep” search on Pinterest will bring up thousands of options!
- Buy premade meals from the store! If you’re too busy or sick to make homemade food items, it’s ok to buy premade food from the store. Costco often has lots of healthy options.
- Request meals instead of baby shower gifts.
Your postpartum self will thank you for nourishing her well!
SET BOUNDARIES
Setting boundaries is hard for many women! But it’s crucial to experiencing a restful and positive postpartum season.
As you approach your due date there’s a good chance you’ll get many daily text messages asking “is baby here yet?”. Then once baby is born you’ll likely have lots of excited friends and family wanting to come meet him/her. These are two areas I strongly recommend putting some boundaries in place!
The first week or two (AT MINIMUM!) should be focused on healing, skin-on-skin, breastfeeding (if that’s the route you take), and learning all about this tiny new human! I know your friends and family are excited, but there’s nothing wrong with requesting a week or two before an influx of visitors!
The first week after I gave birth I was in agonizing pain any time I put on a shirt! So I was basically topless for 7-10 days 🙊 Most woman are wearing an adult diaper for the first 1-4 weeks! Before giving birth think about which individuals you’d be comfortable seeing under those conditions!
INVITE HELPERS
During the first few months be mindful of who you invite over. Resist the urge to “host” guests in your home. You should invite people who will bring you a hot meal, do a load of laundry, or pick up groceries for you! Now’s not the time for guests who expect to be taken care of.
At the end of the day these boundaries will look different for everyone. Some people choose to do no visitors for several weeks, while others have immediate family visit. What’s most important is that you are inviting the people YOU want to meet your baby, and you aren’t trying not to offend people.
Boundaries may even look like setting time limits on visits. Don’t feel bad using excuses like “I’m going to take a nap now”, or “we have another visitor coming soon”.
PREPARE YOUR HOME
There are lots of ways you can prepare your home for a positive postpartum experience. We often think of preparing the nursery for baby when the reality is that many newborns don’t even sleep in their nursery!
Don’t forget to prepare the rest of your home for both baby and mom!
PREPARING FOR BABY
- Have a few diaper stations throughout the home
- Have a safe sleep set up for baby in your master bedroom
- Clear out a drawer for baby in your master bedroom for easy middle of the night access to clean sleepers, etc.
- Hang black out curtains
- Prepare/sanitize bottles or breastpumps
PREPARING FOR MOM
- Stock up on postpartum supplies like maxi-pads and liners, peri bottle, and healing sprays for every bathroom
- Create a snack station near the couch and/or bed (breastfeeding hunger is real!)
- Purchase a long phone charger for those times when you’re nap-trapped
- Purchase/borrow some books, or pick out a new TV series. You’ll likely be sitting LOTS
- Invest in some comfy pajamas and loungewear
LOWER YOUR EXPECTATIONS
The reality is that your life is not going to look “normal” for quite some time. Babies typically take several months to be on any sort of schedule.
Try to lower your expectations during these first months. Your house might not be as clean as you’d like, the baby weight might not fall right off, and it may take some time adjusting to life with a new family member. But having realistic expectations can reduce frustration and stress!
And PLEASE, do not compare yourself with other new moms on social media who seem to have it all together. Remember, you’re seeing their highlight reel, not every second of their day.
SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
By doing all, or some, of these things you will set yourself and your family up for success with a new baby!
The newborn days are hard, but oh so rewarding. By preparing for them, you give yourself the opportunity to have a positive fourth trimester!
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